I bought a new crappy external 56k modem because the old one lost the will to live. Or, at the very least, it lost the will to modulate and demodulate.
I imagine I will be bashing it with a hammer and posting pictures of its demise in the near future.
On an unrelated note: Why have the tenders for Satan’s Poodle web design not been pouring in? That site is going to be famous, and then you’ll be sorry you didn’t help me out.