Category: surreal

may contain “weird,” “strange,” and “pointless”

Dreaming of volcanoes

I recently discovered while reading about South Africa on wikipedia that South Africa politically owns the Prince Edward Islands. I starting thinking that I should pay a visit to this far flung South African destination. The islands have a volcanic origin, and the volcano is active. Technically, this means that there is a volcano in South Africa. How can we not visit the South African volcano?

Presumably because of this (but also possibly due to thinking about Mount Doom) I dreamed that I actually went to visit Marion Island.
I climbed up, but didn’t get all the way over to the edge because it was hot and glowing and dangerous-looking. Then it started to erupt. Kind of. It spat some rocks out into the air and I was worried that I might get hit on the head by them.
I decided it would be a good idea to get off the side of the volcano. As headed away from the crater, I noticed that the other tourists (yes, there were about five other people casually wandering about on the side of the volcano) were all wearing hard-hats. Why the hell wasn’t I given a hard-hat?

I feel a little less enthusiastic about visiting the place now.

Something About Easter

I went for a walk and look what I found at the bus-stop.
In case you can’t read the text, in the picture, it is transcribed below. The question marks are for the text that I can’t make out, but I think you’ll get the idea:

Easter, brings, us, joy, &, happiness
All, people, love, Easter, because, they, enjoy, ???
So, many, children, love, the, Easter, bunny
Tell, the, people, to, cellebrate, this, Easter
Every, time, Easter, comes, everybody, ???
Rise, shine, it’s, EASTER!!!!

Brad Meyer

Thanks Brad. You made my day! Posted by Picasa

So who’s been watching the Shining then?

All work and no play makes jack a dull boy.
All work and no play makes jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes jack a dull boy
all worjk and no play makes jack adull boy
all work nd no play makes jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes jack a dull boy
All Works and no play makes jack a sull boy
All work and no play makes jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes jAvk a dull boy
All work and no play makes jack adull boy.
All wokr and No play make Jack a dull boy
All worka nd play makes jack a dull boy.
All work and no play makes jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes jack a dull boy.
all work and no play makes Jack a duill boy
Alll woirk and no play makes jack a dull boyu

A Taste of Homeless Talk

My favourite writer for homeless talk has to be Luke Jentile. He writes the opinion column “Burning Point.”
I agree with the burning bit. Possibly his writing desk is on fire, so he needs to write the article in quite a hurry.
Though, so far I haven’t been able to figure out the point.

Here’s a little extract from his latest offering:
“Then there is this rotation and revolving of the planet, which makes us count the time, but we can’t be accurate because we found this universe already existing for billions of years.”

Another superlative scribe is Dr Lebeko Lebenya with his “Afrikan Wizdom” column. Did you know that Tim and Buktu established the University of Tim-Buktu in Mali, Western Afrika (sic)?
And were you aware that the Roman Army was also known as The Crusaders?
Or that one can “give out” wisdom?

Thank god for the good Doctor Lebenya.

DME Filing System

I visited the Department of Minerals and Energy (DME). I needed to
locate certain Environmental Management Programmes (EMPs) and extract
information from them. None of the EMPs are digitised.

They have a static self-organising filing system.
The “self-organising” bit means that the files are placed on the
shelves in random order, and one then waits for organisation to evolve
by itself. The “static” bit means that nothing changes.
Yes, a static self-organising system is oxymoronic.

I’m actually being unfair. The files aren’t on the shelf in random
order. Each file is actually numbered. It’s just that no-one working at
the DME could tell us how the file numbers linked up with any other
information regarding the mines we were interested in. Needless to say,
the newer files were not given any numbers.

Fun times!